My parents don�t understand that their kids are growing up to be so fucked up. They don�t see it at all. If I were, I dunno, �normal�, I would have turned out like Tim. They think Tim is turning out to be so fucked up just because he was born fucked up. And since they only had two kids� well�

Ug. I�ve been thinking way too much lately. Thinking is not good. Thinking makes you realize things. Thinking is depressing.

...but it�s not like you can help �thinking.� It�s always questioning, always asking why, always on that quest to be one step ahead� always wanting, needing more knowledge and understanding� and you know why? Because I�m human. That�s what separates us from the animals�

I feel so void lately. Insignificant. Helpless. Hopeless. Desperate. But only on the inside.

Lost in the paradox of my own ignorance.

I�ve been thinking about that sentence a lot in the past half hour. It makes a lot of sense when you get down to it. How deep. Yay. I was so full of thoughts like this on the way home from Terminator 3, but Rob made me help him move the boat and that squashed all insight welling up inside of me. Terrific.

I�ll try to figure out what the hell I�m talking about in my next entry�